Thought Babble: They Were... You Are.

November 19, 2014

If you ask me how I learned... It was because I had them.

He was my high school sweetheart. He made me love the feeling of infatuation. Everyone loved him, he gave me my first rainbows and butterflies... I knew that it wasn't going to last because we were too young but I chose to take the chance. When it ended... I knew that it was a good experience. There was no regret that he happened.

He was the idea of the perfect guy in my life. He loved me not because I can do all sorts of things, he loved me because  I was who I was.  He never told you that he has to go away. After he passed, I could never get over the feeling of not having him around. I always had good stories to tell whenever people ask me about him. Until now I ask why must he be the one to leave... But I know that he's always there guiding me. I still see him in my dreams. I'll always love him. He's with Him now, I know that he's in a much better place.

He was more than just a friend. He was my best friend. We met when we were in high school. We saw each other grow. He supported me in every boyfriend and I hated all his girlfriends because no one ever seem to be good enough for him. (Well, at least for me) We were never single at the same time. Whatever we had, we never talked about. Maybe there was or maybe it was just something that should never be spoken of. We will always be a loose end.

He was my first ever love. I was his first love. That relationship were in you wanted to try everything together. That first kiss, dates and seeing new places together. We had the best memories. I preserved those memories in a happy place. Even if we were just kids... we were in love. We may never be close as we were before but I can never be mad at him. Whenever I see him around, I'd always smile. Why? He'll always be a reminder that things are all patched up together because I was able to learn all those lessons with him.

He seemed to be the guy whom I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. I thought that life wouldn't get any better than that. He was the sweetest guy in the world who is never afraid to show everyone that I was his, but then life got in the way. Those things he did to me? He did to someone else too... Little did I know, I was never enough and he cheated. It broke me into pieces to the point that I could never bring it back. Maybe my idea of love wasn't his.

But, you? 

You are a little bit of all of them. The real life version of having the best guy in the world and having all those butterflies in my tummy again. You know I always wanted someone to sweep me off of my feet... and you know that you're not that vocal but through you I have learned that there are different versions of making someone feel like a princess.The person whom I know loves every bit of me and even my flaws. The best friend, the jokes only we can understand. We are the version of "young love" I imagined perfectly our "older selves" would be. You picked up the pieces when I couldn't even dare to pick it up myself. Before you, I thought shallow things matter. When you came along, I realized who mattered the most in all of them and that's you. You're It.

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